Posted by: Tangled Web | March 18, 2010

So Where do they Cast all those Hollywood Commercials?

So Where do they Cast all those Hollywood Commercials?

Out of things to do in LA?  Or want to give a visitor a behind the scenes look at the inner workings of Hollywood?  Then pop your head into the cryptic cult of commercial casting at 200 S. La Brea, 2nd floor. Seriously, it’s easy. You can walk right in.

Where the Magic Happens

At 200 S. La Brea you will get to experience such attractions as: wall to wall carpeting, long waiting benches, also carpeted, the chalkboard list of spots casting today, and some intriguing modern art including orange rubber dog statues scattered around the waiting room.

You will witness the stages of a commercial audition:

Oh the Possibilities!

1) Excited Entry-You actually get the appointment that could provide you health care and the yearly income of a rural school teacher from just one day of work! Oh joy!

Clones. Clones!

2) Fear and disillusionment-You see 20-30 peole in the waiting area who look exactly like you, or a little cuter, are dressed just like you, and all want the same job just as desperately as you do.

I love Subway. I love Subway. I love Subway

3)Recommitment-You’re going to quell those butterflies by sheer brain power.  You’re gonna say “Good News! $5.00 footlongs are back!” better than anybody!

Star of Film and Television: Matt Crabtree descends into STAGE 4: MALAZE

4)Malaze-How long have you been in this room staring at these slightly more attractive clones of yourself?? You want to die.  You want to be a movie star.  You want a cheeseburger.

5)Naptimehelps your lines solidify in your memory.  Don’t forget to  feed your meter beforehand.

I'm Memorizing.

6)Post-nerves Walk to Car-Did I swish that Listerene humorously enough? Was my lip synching on cue? Was my faux orgasmic response to that KFC chicken sandwich over the top? Ahhhh!!!!!!! I need an Aspirin.

So how is this a sneak peek into the workings of real Hollywood you ask? How could the petty monotony of corporate brainwashing have anything to do with the lives of the rich and famous?  Well, because before they were rich and famous, they were doing commercials. Check out Brad Pitt’s 1980s Pringles Spot.

Post-Performance Aspirin

The actors you will see before you at 200 S. La Brea, dressed as they are to resemble the average joe, are taking their hard earned advert capital and using it to pay for the acting classes,

Spot the Orange Pup

headshots, improv workshops and script writing seminars that will make them the stars of tomorrow.  But for now, they’re just hoping to sell you some mouthwash.

Sometimes all that hard work leads straight to the set: Marshalls Commercial Nov. 2009

Important Note: If you do visit 200 S. La Brea, please do NOT act rowdy or draw attention to yourself, and do NOT crash a commercial audition. This would be very disruptive to the casting directors working there and reflect badly on the well meaning LA Travelbug Establishment.  Thank you.

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Responses

  1. You’re so precious! 🙂 I loved your Marshall’s Commercial.

  2. Love your writing!


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