Spot the Vegan: Expert Level! @ Real Food Daily
Are you up to the challenge?
Characteristics to look for:
1) shifty, hungry eyes, 2) earth tone clothing, 3) curly hair (I swear. Do the research), 4) hemp jewelry, 5) snooty attitude, 6) often smell like wheatgrass
“Spot the Vegan: For Beginners” takes place at BOA Steakhouse, where it is easy to tell the vegans by the disgusted look on their face and their plate of raw vegetables.
When you become advanced enough, move on to ‘Spot the Vegan: Expert Level” at Real Food Daily, the Vegan Café. This vegan restaurant is so good that tons of non-vegans go there. And they are all eating vegan food, so it is hard to tell!!! There’s nothing I love more than a big juicy piece of animal flesh, medium rare…but I still love eating at RFD.
SCANDAL: Could RFT be owned by a non-vegan?? Notice the very un-vegan cherry pie poster in the bathroom….hmmm. It is a big mystery how vegan chefs were able to come up with all the creatively delicious recipes on the RFD menu while subsisting on such low calorie counts.
How could a poor malnourished vegan devotee come up with creamy Cashew Jalapeno Cheese for vegan nachos when they are subsisting on like 2 of the 10 food groups?! Well, whether it’s a high functioning vegan or a meat-loving imposter making this stuff up, it is delicious.
The Nachos are the best, the soups and wraps always have spreads and spices added that are scrumptious. The Chop BBQ Tofu salad is hearty and yummy, and the ‘meatloaf’ is confusing but awesome. Did I mention that their specials are always the best thing on the menu and they have new ones every week? Leave room for dessert. I don’t know how they do it, but their sweets are dependably moist, lovely, and memorable. I think they add a little pig fat somewhere…but they claim, no.
If your neighbor from when you were a child in New Zealand visits you, it is imperative that you bring her to RFD to give her the full California experience. She will enjoy her hearty veggie-burger-in-a-salad, but will express her weakness from lack of calories afterwards and will happily eat the rest of your nachos. Make sure to take her to ‘Sprinkles’ cupcake café in Beverly Hills afterward (review coming soon).
Your kiwi friend will be so happy when she is done eating her food and your nachos that she will make you a bird of paradise out of a napkin. Supposedly people in NZ have never seen Birds o Paradise and her skills have never been appreciated.
We left it for our waiter as a token our our appreciation for his ‘fake-it-till-you-make-it’ vegan style. My vote is he was a total meat freak.